Finding my way
by ForeverMeNeko
Summary: Roxas is a nobody that cant "feel" and protects Twilight Town. Will the newest member of Orgy XIII make him learn how to feel again? AkuRoku! Please Review! Rated T for cursing, death, and violence.
1. Chapter 1

_**Disclaimer-I don't own Kingdom Hearts nor am I claiming it **__**J **_

**A/N- Rated T fro violence and minor cursing and death, enjoy!**

" You son of a bitch!" Hayner said as he tried to punch me in the face. I jumped out of the way, landing low on my feet, then when he tried to come back to hit me again, I kicked his legs down then pinned him to the ground.

"You should know better than to fight _me_ Hayner." I retorted in my usual monotone voice. He tried to get up again, but I kept him down. "Seifer walk into heartless and nobody territory, there was nothing I could do." I said still in monotone.

I jumped off him and walked away, getting glares while walking down the hall way.

"Hayner!" I turned to see Olette helping him up.

Hayners boyfriend, Seifer, was drunk and entered the Heartless and Nobody side of town. The Heatless were evil creatures that ate peoples heart. They didn't attack nobodies, because of there cold behavior…almost…like we didn't have hearts.

And you could guess, I was a nobody. And I actually have a heartless as a pet, anyway, Seifer ended up getting murder by the Heartless, the Neon Shadows were the most common around our part.

The nobodies were a group called Organization XIII (even though we only have 12 members) we keep the Heartless under control and in our part of the city, and even though everyone hates us, they need us, otherwise they would be dead.

A few minutes of walking past and I walked into the dark side of the city with an giant castle, everyone calls it The Castle That Never Was, because before the King of TT moved in there he died, and it was never used again….That's till us and the Heartless came along.

_In TCTNW_

I walked down the white hallways till I found the room with the number XIII in roman numbers. I walked into the white room ( you have to wonder how we don't go crazy with all the white) went to the closet and grab the long black cloak for today's meeting.

I looked down when I felt something tugging at my robe.

" Hello Bartholomew." I small smile tugged at my lips when I picked up the little black Heartless.

His full name was Bartholomew Alejandro Mic-Gonzales. Don't ask why I named him that it wasn't my idea, another nobody, Demyx, a Sitar player with a mullet/ Mohawk for hair begged me to name him that.

I took the bug like creature with me to the Gathering of Nothing, and made my self a portal to my chiar that was about 50 feet of the ground.

We didn't control the Heartless just by commanding them like a dog. No. We held special powers and weapons. I was one of the most important, I have two Keyblades that collect the hearts of the heartless, we keep those hearts to ones that lost part of their heart, but there was nothing we could do to ones that lost their heart completely.

We use those weapons to keep them to going to the other part of town.

"Hey Rox!" Demyx yelled at me when he summoned him self in his chair. I waved and turned my attention to the superior.

"Today, we have a new member, please treat him nicely till he is used to everything." He said then a figure came in with the black orgy coat. He took of his hood and he took my breath away. He has the Redest and spikyest hair I have ever seen, and the most beautiful Emarald green eyes with two tear drop tattoos under both eyes.

"Welcome Axel, Number VIII, The Furry Of Dancing Flames."

**A/N- I really like how I wrote this chapter J im going to continue, but if I don't get any reviews updates will be slow. Even one Review will make me happy, and help me post!**

**No Flaming or bashing Please!**


	2. Chapter 2

_**Disclaimer- I do not own KH nor will I ever.**_

_**WARNING- some foul language in this chapter.**_

Everyone was excused after a few notes about heartless. I started to summon a portal to go back to my room when the our leader, Xemnas, told me to wait.

"Roxas, would you mind showing Axel were his room is?" he asked, but it was an order. Not a question.

"Yeah, of course." I said, then summoned both me and Axel to a hallway in the castle. "come on your room is this way." I said, motioning for him to fallow me.

"Is everyone like that?" He asked, with a bit of bitterness in his tone.

"What?" I asked turning to face him.

"Is everyone so…cold? So heartless?" He asked with curiosity in his eyes. I scoffed.

"If you want someone with a heart go talk to Demyx he's right next to you." I said then keep walking not even checking to see if he was fallowing me. All of the sudden I firm hand on my shoulder making me turn around and Bartholomew hissed at the one who dared touch me. I spun around to face Axel and see my pet about to attack and he looked afraid of the little bug like creature.

"Smart move." I said sarcastically. " You made Bartholomew mad, now what did want to say?" I said while calming the Neoshadow down. He looked at me with…sad, disappointed? I couldn't make the right words for the look in his eyes when he looked at me.

"Its such a waste your so beautiful, yet your so broken." He whispered. I blushed a bit then stopped walking when I realized we were at his room.

"Whatever, here's your room, if you need anything talk to Demyx cause nobody else will answer you." And with that said I walked to my own room, shut the door, and laid on my bed. _'what was that? He called me beautiful…?And why did I blush?' _I thought for a little while then realized it was almost 7PM. I sighed not wanting to go back home to my parents and twin. I looked down at my pet as he whimpered slightly when I got ready to leave.

"….You know what, I'm taking you home with me tonight." I said to Bartholomew, picking him up. " Just don't try to wake up Sora in the morning again, you know he hates you guys." I left the room and started to walk down the white hallway.

"Roxas." Axel. He caught up to me and walked with me. "Sorry about earlier…." He said with a dejected voice.

"Its fine I really don't care." I said with a monotone voice, as I kept Barth from attacking Axel. "I wouldn't try that again if you don't want my pet to attack you." He looked at me like I was crazy.

"How can you keep that thing as a pet?" He asked shocked, and a bit worried since we were out of heatless and nobody territory.

"Relax , he wont hurt anyone unless I say so." I said then kept walking till I realized he wasn't fallowing me. I turned around and wanted to laugh at his face. I got 8 words fro you _'what the hell is wrong with this kid.'_ but that's the usual reaction I get. "you coming?" I asked with teasing voice. He nods his head and we keep walking, but when I finally look to see were I'm going, the small smile that made its way to my lips disappeared. Sora was there, on the front porch and saw everything that just happened. He looked…hurt? I don't know I've never been good with emotions.

"Roxy?" Axel placed his hand on my shoulder, "You okay?" I nodded.

"Yeah, I uh.. I got to go." I said then walked up to my home.

"Rox?" Soar asked really confused.

"What?" I asked brushing passed him into the warm house. Sora looked at me then back out side then back to me.

"Who was that? And why were you smiling? And what did you bring that _thing _in here?" He hissed out the last question, glaring at Bartholomew. I sighed, was I not allowed to smile every now and then?

"He's just a new guy, I smiled cause of his reaction to Bartholomew, and I brought him because he begged me." I said walking up the stairs to go to my room, but I didn't get very far cause he grabbed my arm and pulled me down.

"Its not fair, you're my brother, and I have tried for years to get you to smile, and then that redhead comes along and you instantly do." He started to tear up. "Why?" he started crying. This is why I didn't want him to see that, cause i knew he would do this. Its not like I hate my brother, I really do care for him, but I just acted like I don't care cause Sora's the favorite of our parents. And they hate what I have become, so they always try to keep me away from Sora, so that's what I did.

"Sora." I said sighing, the I wrapped my arms around him in a hug. "I'm sorry, but you know mom and dad don't want me near you, non the less talk to you." he hugged me back and we stood there for awhile till he finally calmed down.

"Its okay Rox just….please talk to me more." He said with still a few tears leaking. " Promise me."

"I promise Sora." He hugged me again but then we were interrupted.

"Roxas let go of your brother and go up stairs." Tifa. My step mom. Our real mother was named Airith (_**Sorry if I spelled her name wrong :p )**_ but she died in a car accident. I pulled away from Sora and Cloud (my dad) pulled him towards himself. I glared at Tifa, and did what I was told.

I lied in my bed petting the little Neoshadow. As it purred nuzzling my arm.

"I have a pretty fucked up family don't I?" I said to my pet then fell asleep.

_**A/N- longer chapter then the other one, I personally did not like this chapter :P but you tell me if it wasn't or not! All you have to do is click the button below! **__**J**_


	3. Chapter 3

Everyone started to go home after the final bell rang. And I waited till everyone was gone to go to the music room. In the middle of the dark room lied a piano. I walked over to it and sat on the bench. I thought about Axel…and what he said and how he made me feel different than anyone else I have met. And I also remember that even if I did have feelings for him, it wasn't allowed in the organization to date another member. _we can not feel, we are not even supposed to have those feelings, our only purpose is to protect he city, you belong to us…to this darker side. _is what Xemnas lectured me a few days after Axel arrived.

I began to put my thoughts with the music and I started to play. _you are not allowed to love Axel._ Golden eyes bored into mine when he said that and I left without a single word. I began to sing with the music.

_I'm at war with the world_

_And they try to pull me into the dark_

_I struggle to find my faith_

_As I'm slipping from your arms_

_It's getting harder to stay awake_

_And my strength is fading fast_

_You breathe into me at last_

_I'm awake, I'm alive_

_Now I know what I believe inside_

_Now it's my time_

_I'll do what I want 'cause this is my life_

_(Here, right now)_

_Right here, right now_

_Stand my ground and never back down_

_I know what I believe inside_

_I'm awake, and I'm alive_

_I'm at war with the world_

_'Cause I ain't never gonna sell my soul_

_I've already made up my mind_

_No matter what, I can't be bought or sold_

_When my faith is getting weak_

_And I feel like giving in_

_You breathe into me again_

_I'm awake, I'm alive_

_Now I know what I believe inside_

_Now it's my time_

_I'll do what I want 'cause this is my life_

_(Here, right now)_

_Right here, right now_

_Stand my ground and never back down_

_I know what I believe inside_

_I'm awake, and I'm alive_

_Waking up, waking up_

_Waking up, waking up_

_Waking up, waking up_

_Waking up, waking up in the dark_

_I can feel you in my sleep_

_In your arms, I feel you breathe into me_

_Forever hold this heart that I will give to you_

_Forever I will live for you_

_I'm awake, I'm alive_

_Now I know what I believe inside_

_Now it's my time_

_I'll do what I want 'cause this is my life_

_(Here, right now)_

_Right here, right now_

_Stand my ground and never back down_

_I know what I believe inside_

_I'm awake, and I'm alive_

_Waking up, waking up_

_Waking up, waking up_

_Waking up, waking up_

_Waking up, waking up_

My fingers stop and all you heard was my soft pants. Then clapping. I spun around and saw Axel clapping, leaning against the door frame.

"You have a beautiful voice Roxy," I blushed at the comment. "But what's the meaning behind the song?" He asked with a bit of worry and concern in his eyes.

"What do you mean?" I manage to squeak out as he sat next to me. He looked at me then said,

"No one can put so much feeling and soul into a song like you just did and say that there was no meaning behind it." He said his face getting closer to mine.

"I-…I-" I stumbled as his face kept getting closer.

"What is it Roxy?" I felt his breath on my face.

"I-it's a rule.. I'm not supposed to, but I-…I'm falling for you Axel." I finally mange to say and he closed the gap in between us. His lips met mine in a passionate kiss, his lips were sweet and I kissed back with just as much force as him. His tongue nibbled at my bottom lip wanting permission which I granted. His tongue covered every part of my mouth memorizing it, our tongues met and fought for dominance which Axel won. We finally broke apart for air, and my face was as red as his hair.

"I think I'm falling for you too Roxas…"He said then kissed me again.


	4. Chapter 4

**I' on a roll today! :D I hope this keeps up,I went back to read my stories and was like"MUST FINISH" My KH mood is back and better then ever!(I had to much sugars...)**

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><p>I pulled away from Axel, though I didn't want to, but Xemnas would have my head if he found out.<p>

"I-we can't do this..."I started to pace around."I just don't understand,I just met you and your making me feel so..so.." I couldn't describe it,that warm feeling,my heart beats faster. Axel tilted my chin up making me stop pacing, and mad me look up at his Emerald eyes.

"Why are you with them?"He asked joke completly serious.I scoffed.

"To you they may seem cold hearted and empty,but to me they are my family because the only one in my biological family that probably gives a damn is by twin."My voice was starting to raise."They are all I have,I need them and they need me.I posses the weapons that keeps this city safe and balanced." I looked up at the clock and saw it was time for me to go to the castle."I gotta go..." I grabbed my stuff,and started to head out the door until Axel grabbed my wrist to stop me.

"Roxas I didn't mean it like that,it's just you deserve better,a better life."I sighed.

"Look we have a meeting today we wont make it in time if we keep talking about this."I walked outside to see barthy waiting for me."Hey little guy time for you to go back home with the others."I formed a portal,and saw from the corner of my eye Axel following me."Come on were late."

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><p>The meeting was short, and was a knock on my door.<p>

"Demyx I don't feel like hearing you play today."I yelled and buried my face in my pillow.I heard my door creak open.

"I'm not Demyx so can I come in?"I sat up at the was Axel,he closed the door behind him.I felt the bed dip next to me and I sat up."I don't know why you don't remember me..."

"...We met before?"I asked in a whisper."I don't remember my childhood at all..." My head started to ache badly.I groaned in pain and held my head in my hands.

"Woah, are you alright?"Axel cradeled my head against his chest.I shook my head.

"Whenever I try to remember it hurts..."I sat there, and I almost fell asleep till Axel made me look up at leaned in closer and kissed me and I didn't hesitate to kiss back when he pulled away I asked"What is this feeling...?You make me feel so light like everythings perfect and there's nothing to worry about."I felt heat rise to my cheeks when he started to laugh at kissed me again just a quick peck.

"I'm not laughing at you it's just I feel the same, your the only one I have ever felt like this for.."He trailed off once my attention went fro him to the heartless pawing at my leg demanding attention.I giggled while picking him up and placing him in my lap.

"Aw he's jealous."I cooed as the bug like creature started nuzzeling me.

"Oi your going to have to share,I'm not planning to lose him to a little bug."Barth hissed at the word bug.

"Hey you be nice to him,he's my first friend,and pet."I petted him some leaned back to where he was sitting in a lazy position against the wall,I put my pet down and leaned against stroked my hair,and by accident we both feel asleep,but it was the best sleep I have had in years.

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><p>I woke up with warm arms around me and saw Axel still sleeping looking very content.<em>wait a mintute... <em>I thought. _oh no!Sora! _He sleep at the time he did that he was injured and had to must have been worried sick.I got up,wrote a quick note for Axel and ran home to see the house empty.I walked in,but it seemed no one was home.

"Hello?"I called out.

"Roxas?" I turned and saw looked awful, like he didn't sleep at all last night.I was ingulfed in a hug my my twin."Where were you?! I had to beg mom and dad to let me skip so I could see you!"

"..Sorry I fell asleep by accident..."Well atleast it wasn't a lie...

**ding dong**

****"I got it."I went to the door and when I opened it there was Axel.

"How on earth was I supposed to read this?your penmenship is horrible."He said holding up the note,I just laughed."Wel we already missed half the day so.."He trailed off and gave my cheek a kiss.

"Would you go on a date with me?"

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><p><strong>Kay that's it for today!I love reviews so leave one please?I don't own KH.<strong>

***I'm looking for a betta!Interested?Just message me!**

**~neko**


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